I did know that my own mind would come up with its own ideas as to how each servitor would respond. I'd already been meditating and releasing tension, getting into trance. I knew I needed to clear my mind so I was receptive to communication through my mind, and not from my mind.
Timothy sent me warmth and caring feelings, that was the first emotion I picked up on. He also felt older-brotherly in the sense that he doesn't care for any power dynamic where I'm in charge. Ha, that'd be the same with me and my physical younger brother. Timothy is still programmed to be sexually attracted to me though. I want him to be comfortable.
Simon sends me romantic love as well as the caring feelings. He wants to be my lover. I wasn't sure if he'd changed his mind over time or not. There is a basis for Simon to be attracted to me. He was designed to have a cunning side (I thought it'd be an interesting insert). Cunning is a form of emotional intelligence more seen in the latter signs of the zodiac, and they are attracted to Libra (my sign) which isn't too cunning and is rather giving. I have a habit of being suspicious and projecting, though I reckon I'm usually aware of what I project. Anyway, part of me becomes suspicious that because Simon can be cunning he may think that in being my lover he may gain from it. But he was also programmed to care for me so I'll suspend that. Simon was also only my second servitor and made with Lucifer, so perhaps Lucifer tweaked him in this way for my benefit.
Lisa was more chilled and distant when compared to the other two. She may have been aware of my projecting. She actually felt rather serious. My wards are complicated, I wonder what Lilith's impact on shaping her has actually done. I talked to Lisa about my projecting (I know it's caused by a sense of insecurity I'm working through) and about the confusion on my diverged stance on my personal ethics. I may have felt some sexual energy from her briefly. She is still comforting.
Dominic is a rather dominant force. Belial helped design him to fulfill his primary purpose: to be a defender. I could feel sore impressions on my ass and lower-thighs, as if he were fucking me roughly. At least I knew he wanted to. He likes me, which is something he wasn't programmed to do. But why would he not like me I suppose, I'm not a demanding creator, and we are sexually attracted to each other.
Next power-up ritual I intend to do will be for my four Harems. I bought two clay statues to paint yesterday and they will be for Deity class servitors should I decide to create them.
No comments:
Post a Comment